Learning to Love When It Feels Like the Hardest Thing to Do
When a neighbor tests your patience, a family member lets you down, or even someone rubs you the wrong way, it can be challenging to show them compassion. We know we’re supposed to love others, but how do we overcome the tendency to brush people off who annoy us?
Many believers, including church leaders, often find themselves in need of a reminder of what love truly means and why it matters.
The good news…God doesn’t leave us alone to figure it out. He gifted us with His Word. He knows it isn’t an easy task to love everyone the same way Jesus loves us, but He will be with you along the way.
Something we often forget is that we aren’t always easy to love either. We make mistakes. We fall short. We get impatient and self-centered. Yet God still chooses us. He loves us faithfully, not because we’re perfect, but because He is.
That truth grounds us when loving others feels impossible. The love we’ve freely received from God becomes the love we’re empowered to give even on the hardest days.
Why Do We Struggle to Love Others?
We might not say it out loud, but most of us carry around a quiet list of “reasons” that make it easier to NOT love someone.
- They never change
- It’s not my job to fix them
- They hurt me
- I’m too busy
- We don’t agree
- Someone else will step in
These are small excuses we’ve learned to justify. Over time, they become a barrier between relationships and barricade the love God is calling us to share.
This is when scripture reminds us that love is essential.
“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.” — 1 John 4:7 (NIV)
Love is a defining mark of someone who knows God. Not just love for the people we like, but for the people we find hardest to love.
What Does the Bible Say About Loving Others?
Jesus made it clear that love is foundational and central to the gospel. It’s how people will know we’re His disciples. And it’s how communities are transformed.
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” — Matthew 22:37–39 (NIV)
When we love others, we create space for hope to take root. We open doors for healing, conversation, and spiritual growth. Love does what words alone cannot.
What Is the True Meaning of Loving Someone?
Loving others means showing care, patience, and value to people even when it feels inconvenient or uncomfortable.
It means looking at someone through the lens of God’s grace, rather than our personal preferences. It means forgiving when we do not feel like it. Listening when we would rather speak. Engaging with kindness when we are tempted to pull away.
Love is not passive. It’s active. It moves us towards others with purpose. It reflects the love God has already shown us.
“We love because He first loved us.” — 1 John 4:19 (NIV)
That is the true meaning of loving someone. It is choosing to give what we have already received.
To read more about what the bible says about loving others, check out our previous blog.
The Invitation to Love Beyond Comfort
Loving others is challenging because it requires us to go beyond ourselves. It forces us to confront pride, fear, impatience, and even past wounds.
But here’s the good news: When God asks us to love, He gives us what we need to do it. We do not have to feel fully equipped or naturally compassionate. We just need to be willing.
That is where transformation begins. Not only in others but in us, too.
A Fun Challenge to Start Loving Others
Love can feel like a big, overwhelming goal. So, let’s make it simple and fun. Here’s a challenge you can start today, and even invite your small group or church to join: The “Love in Action” Scavenger Hunt.
This is a one-week challenge with seven mini acts of love. Complete one each day, in any order.
Each of these actions is simple, but together they help reframe what love looks like in your daily life. They show your community that kindness and compassion are possible right where you are.
And the best part? You never know what kind of conversations these acts might spark.
Helping Your Church Lead in Love
As a church leader, you know the importance of creating a culture of love. But that culture starts with small steps. It grows when people feel empowered to take a chance.
The Love Your Neighbor Kit was created to help you make that possible. It offers practical ways for your church to begin loving others through simple, everyday actions. It is more than a resource. It is a movement of faith in action.
Request a kit today and take the first step toward building a church known for its love.
You Can Begin Today
If you are a pastor or church leader, bring this challenge to your staff or congregation. Use it to start a conversation about how your community can love more like Jesus.
If you are a believer who wants to grow in this area, choose one of the actions from the challenge and do it this week. Invite a friend to join you. Reflect together on what you learn.
Loving others may never be easy, but it is always worth it. You do not have to do it perfectly. You just need to begin. Let love lead the way.
